World Rugby Ban the Pooper Combination!

In a shocking law change, World Rugby have announced that the feared Pooper combination of David Pocock and Michael Hooper will now be illegal. The pairing was dominant in 2015 leading the Australian charge to the Rugby Championship title as well as their run to the Rugby World Cup final, where they fell short to the New Zealand All Blacks.

Wallabies coach Michael Cheika was visibly angry, breaking windows and doors (something he has never done before). His staff claimed the door broke when he “opened it the wrong way” and that “he was screaming profanities out of guilt for breaking it”.

As for the opposition, they all seemed relieved. Scotland’s Vern Cotter said “It would’ve been nice of them to do this a few months ago, as well as banning all South African refs, but I guess it will do”. Wales Coach Warren Gatland also offered a comment stating that “There was no way to prepare for the Pooper, to this day I still have nightmares about it.”

World Rugby officials stated the reason for the ban was they wanted to keep the breakdown competitive, as fans were tired of seeing Hooper and Pocock steal every single ball, something they felt was driving down tv viewings and game attendances.

“Anytime the Wallabies beat the All Blacks AND the Springboks in the same year we know something isn’t right” they said. When they got out of the pool of death that easily we knew we had to draw a line.”